I have been meaning to write, and I have so many things I want to write about in the last few days, but nothing feels right. I have been wanting to talk to friends, but again nothing feels right, so in the end I did not talk to any. I bury myself in the ever piling work at the office, I come home and sleep at 10pm, which to most other people is like sleeping at 7pm, as I am a nocturnal animal. Not that I am sad, and neither am I depressed. I feel nothing really. He has called 3 times since, with many other little smses and dots of emails, and I don't feel anything.
Am I numb? Or am I okay with this whole business? I am not sure. People say time heals, but little time has passed since - it's only been 3 days. Am I supposed to be like this? Not that I am complaining, although it doesn't really go with my normally overly-sensitive being. Perhaps I am just glad that the whole thing is over, or maybe that the waiting was the killer? Again I am not sure.
May be I am just tired and I just need a little time by myself.
2 comments:
I remembered one time when I buried my love one, my very blood and flesh. I thought I would never be able to move on. The first few months was the hardest, then as time passes by, I can look back and tell myself of how fortunate I was to be able to spend that precious momentary moments I had with her. Those moments I had is always there for me when I need to comfort myself. Those are painful, yet wondeful moments for me. I am sure, once you pass this hump, once you go beyond not having the one you love around, you will realize your characters.
I can't even start to think about the pain doing that. WHat I go through is nothing at all compared to that...
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